Wednesday
Klotzman came to visit me! I got it all wrong and had a great deal of difficulty finding her, but finally we were united and I took her to the flat.
Also took her to kitmaking. Had a good time being snarky with Lauren, who I love among my mateys bc I can be mean to her and she gets it’s not real, but just cathartic when one is seen as a rather excessively sweet person. Also she helped me sew my undertunic, which was good bc I’m so miserable at it and I hate it, rar. The drama of the evening was when Veronica accidentally pressed her hand onto the arm of the couch where previously she had unfortunately stuck a needle. She stood up saying help, help, and we all saw that it had gone right through the fleshy part of her hand under her thumb, and the wrong way, as well.
*shudder*
Worse of all, it wouldn’t come out, bc it was too small and slippery, so Chris proffered his pliers wot he uses for the chainmail and Abbey very bravely pulled it right out.
Damn.
Thursday 25
Finished my Coleridge essay with bare seconds to spare. Whew. At 4 there was a lecture by Alan Chapman, my personal hero, about the history of Great Britain.
Kelly and I went to Sainsbury’s and got a punkin. It was only 99 p!
And Kelly was the Mummy to-night and made us Philly Cheese-steaks for dinner.
We also went to Catweazle with Chris. Sadly he didn’t get to play, but it was an awesome hippie enclave in Oxford, which reminded me powerfully of the Teahaus. There was this old dude dressed as a devil who danced around with great enthusiasm to this one band, and I thought, that’s me in fifty years. Hell, that’s me now.
Friday 26 October
I cannot believe it, but I did absolutely everything for my Cunningham tutorial the day of. I didn’t bother reading the book, 'cos it’s Wuthering Heights, not only have I read it before, but I dislike it. But I can only presume my slackitude didn’t show, bc Professor Cunningham just said it was good and then talked for an hour. Fortunately he doesn’t like it much either.
I don’t care what the crazed Heathcliff fans think, Jane Eyre it a million times better on every level. Ran home in the autumn biting cold grey evening feeling ever so free and joyous.
Was expecting, on my return, cozy punkin carving, but no-one was there, except David, which perturbed me to the point of putting on red lipstick, then Kelly and jemma and I went and joined Abbey who was in the Eagle and child with Ross and Philip, carousing over their anglo-saxon fair swag and apparently interpreting every single thing that was said as innuendo, particularly as related to punkin carving.
We were very merry. I love Wychwood so much.
I had got powdered milk so was able to make a sweet omelette for dinner, which made me happy, as I am very vain of my omelets, as they are always perfect and pretty and delicious.
Samedi
Kelly and I carved the punkin, sitting on newspaper in the kitchen and listening to my official punkin-carving song, “Starman” by Bowie. Also the Beatles and Cat Stevens. It was great. I love the way punkins smell and their slimyness and seeds and all. It’s a serious childhood association thing. Lauren made bacon and we all had the most cozy time.
Lauren and I walked about town looking at things. She was freaked by headless deer carcasses at the butcher’s in the Covered Market. We went home via Cowley, and stopped at my new favourite place, the eastern grocer, for dates, halawa with chocolate, and some bizarre thing in a jar called Alasia that appears to be peanuts, pistachios, and figs in honey, but doesn’t explain itself.
Also Tesco’s for pork pies, chicken, and hummus.
Then naan bread at zak’s.
Got home quite cold and tired with my feet hurting from my lovely new pewter Edwardian boots. So I texted chris to come round the flat instead of us going out. He came by when we were watching the mighty boosh. I was so pleased to see my happy family all watching the boosh: alex, jemma, abbey, and lauren. Then we all talked for a long time.
Dimanche
Wychwood and Lamb and Flag.
We sat in the pub for AGES. Hours and hours, playing 21, the completely heinous and hilarious game where you count around the circle in roman numerals, except every time you reach 21 there’s a new rule, which usually involves changing “i” to “no,” “v” to “daddy,” and “x” to “don’t touch me there”; new rules accumulating until you can’t point, or answer a question by the Question Master, and so on. Chris said that when he was old and eccentric he would keep newts in his ears and have attack weasels. Why is he so amazing?? Then we played Never Have I Ever.
Lauren and I went to Hussain’s for kebab, and he gave us chips on the house, ‘cos we were cute, I suppose. And my donner was the BEST thing I’ve ever eaten in my life, oh man it was amazing. It was so fresh and warm and vivid in the frigid air.
We met wychwood at ANOTHER pub, the Gloc, for quiz night. Quiz was fun and I got to draw vampires also I got the Frankenstein question right through my literary experience, which was sweet. But I was v. tired.
Feeling a little down, I found Lauren at the King’s Arms. She cheered me up by blowing smoke in my face. I had a blackcurrent squash and caught the last bus home.
Monday
Got me books. Many giant heavy things they are, being on Dickens. Bah. Carted them around town. Had awesome hummus wrap at the café crème and then a coconut milk steamer at the alternative tuck shop to warm me up in the chill air. Saw Abbey in the English Faculty and History Faculty libraries. Oh, one Good Thing: on impulse I went into hmv and they had the Vikings! So I bought it. Kelly and Abbey and I had tea at the Queen’s Lane tea shop. I had a cream tea with clotted cream and jam and all, and it was soooooo good it made everything better.
At home I showed everyone The Vikings and they admitted its mind-blowingness. What an awesomely idiotic film.
Another good thing: David’s back! He had been gone all weekend golfing in Birmingham. I missed him.
Tuesday October 30
Cinq heures et demie:
And I meant to get my work done early this week. Bollocks. I basically have one day again. But this time, two due on Thursday. The horror!
Spent all day cleaning my room and updating my blog. Now in half an hour I have to go to “The Goat, or, Who is Sylvia?”, a play that Casey is co producing, about bestiality, I gather. Anyway, Abbey wants to see it.
Tuesday, 30 October 2007
Viking Underwear
Wed Oct 17
Made Viking underwear. Had the most wonderful conversations, about giant squid armageddons and things.
Awesome.
Thurs Oct 18
Made pretzels with kelly. Or rather, watched kelly make pretzels while I hung about singing “happiness is a warm gun.” at any rate, they were delicious.
Had fun abusing wordsworth with Ballam. It was so refreshing to hear him go on a rant about the old ponce that was startlingly similar to my own frequently-given rant on the subject. Seriously, “Resolution and Independence” is one of the stupidest poems ever written. It shows no conception of the actual feelings of other people besides himself.
Walked back up Cowley and stopped in this eastern grocer which turned out to be amazing. Not only did they have fenugreek, in many forms, but pomegranates for 99 p, “fancy jellies” that were basically colored sugar water in plastic fruits, and giant trays of dates for less than two pounds. I bought all this, plus some Japanese sweet pastries. When I got home we were adorable and cozy and domestic and I made methi mutter malai with the fenugreek (methi) and onions and garlic and cream and marrowfat peas. Although not as good as the instant India variety, it was tasty and I was proud to have made real food in a very adult manner, food that actually involved chopping and cooking and things. So everyone had the agra peas and greens and the dates and the sweets, so I was Mummy for to-night.
Also Chris made hummus which was delicious and I had bought Jemma gluten-free pita but she et the wrong one and so was ill the next day and it was sad. Poor darling.
Friday October 19
Ian and Liana came to visit me! Yay! Put on Mummy’s navy-blue Gunne Sax frock and walked all the way down to rail station to fetch them. Although I hadn’t been down past George St. since coming here, everything was so familiar. I hadn’t been there in 5 years, but I was in no doubt as to where everything was.
Yay mateys! I missed them. I took them back to the flat and then we went to the Lamb and Flag where Abbey was pubbing it up with the Wychwood contingent. They sang rude songs, put coasters in each other’s drinks, and variously engaged in roistering. Then we all trooped out for kebab.
I was very sneepy. Ian had to steer me home.
Gave ian and liana me comforter.
Spent a cold, sleepless, heart pounding night.
Sat Oct 20
Shiny morning. Rode the bus into town. There, we went to Oxfam, Blackwell’s Music, and Wadham. On campus we frolicked under the Lingering Tree and also in the chapel. Ian gave his harangue quite loud and boomingly, so that I was a little afraid the chaplain would come in and cry, “This is a house of God!” We also played in the organ. I photographed Ian and Liana frolicking in the Bar Quad, and Liana as Alice by the tiny inexplicable door, and Ian as the Libertine by the plaque for the Earl of Rochester, who course would be an alum of Wadham. We went to the covered market and stopped in Chocology for cocoa and Ritter.
At home we watched some Boosh and I had a nap.
I was awoken by Ian jumping onto my bed and abbey and Kelly bursting out of my closet. I didn’t get it until I saw the mars bar on my bedside table.
This jolly joke was based on the time when I read the sexy bits of Keat’s “Eve of St. Agnes” to everyone and instead of finding it slightly creepy and very atmospheric and romantic, as I do, they thought what Porphyro did was TOTALLY sketchy. So the running joke became the plying of sleeping girls with sweets, for some reason always mars bars.
Anyway, it was one of the most awesome things that anybody’s ever done to me, and considering it’s deviousness was probably Alex’s idea.
Chris came over with his guitar and at my request played “Redemption Song.” Ian played and sang “American Pie.” We all went to the chippy and played and sang again while we waited. The chippy was so pleased that he gave Ian and Chris their deep-fried mars bars for free. I got steak and kidney pie. And there was much rejoicing.
We all dressed up piratically for the undersea bop. I was old greg. On the way we saw Adam Ant. However, when we got there they would not let Ian and Liana in; they said guests were allowed in, but only if they’d been signed up ahead of time on the guest-list, which I’m sure is a new rule. I went in and had a look at the bop, but could find no-one to help. Back outside, Liana made quite a forceful case for letting them in, and asked if there was anyone we could speak to, but they said, it doesn’t matter bc the bop’s over. But of course I’d just been and it wasn’t over, in fact it was not over for at least another hour. Bah. Lies. So of course I went off with Ian and Liana and we got kebab and wandered off vaguely towards some intriguing lights in the sky. Then we got a call from abbey saying the bop was lame and where was kelly? So then everyone was lost and cold and the cab didn’t come for ages and we all froze. boo.
Sun Oct 21
Ian and Liana and I had a cuddly sleepover on the living room floor so I did not freeze.
Went to Wychwood. I fought Abbey and she declaimed the St. Crispin’s Day speech.
Gloucester Green, goodbye.
Love Ian and Liana. Miss them.
Kelly asked if I’d go to Pizza hut with her so she wouldn't feel bad about being so American. After, Chris took me to the Eagle and Child, which is a very good first date for an English student. I wasn’t hungry for food so I got sticky toffee pudding. We had quite a wonderful conversation. We talked about truth and lies, Grammar and history.
In the flat there was Alex, Abbey, Kelly, and David love. I sang “Morningtown Ride” for our lullaby.
MONDAY
Argh, I just finished horrible work, and now it stars AGAIN???
Tuesday
Coleridge’s Biographia Literaria is officially the most horrifying thing. There are of course more horrifying books, but none that I could ever be forced to read.
Horrible, horrible, horrible.
Doooooooooooooooooom.
Made Viking underwear. Had the most wonderful conversations, about giant squid armageddons and things.
Awesome.
Thurs Oct 18
Made pretzels with kelly. Or rather, watched kelly make pretzels while I hung about singing “happiness is a warm gun.” at any rate, they were delicious.
Had fun abusing wordsworth with Ballam. It was so refreshing to hear him go on a rant about the old ponce that was startlingly similar to my own frequently-given rant on the subject. Seriously, “Resolution and Independence” is one of the stupidest poems ever written. It shows no conception of the actual feelings of other people besides himself.
Walked back up Cowley and stopped in this eastern grocer which turned out to be amazing. Not only did they have fenugreek, in many forms, but pomegranates for 99 p, “fancy jellies” that were basically colored sugar water in plastic fruits, and giant trays of dates for less than two pounds. I bought all this, plus some Japanese sweet pastries. When I got home we were adorable and cozy and domestic and I made methi mutter malai with the fenugreek (methi) and onions and garlic and cream and marrowfat peas. Although not as good as the instant India variety, it was tasty and I was proud to have made real food in a very adult manner, food that actually involved chopping and cooking and things. So everyone had the agra peas and greens and the dates and the sweets, so I was Mummy for to-night.
Also Chris made hummus which was delicious and I had bought Jemma gluten-free pita but she et the wrong one and so was ill the next day and it was sad. Poor darling.
Friday October 19
Ian and Liana came to visit me! Yay! Put on Mummy’s navy-blue Gunne Sax frock and walked all the way down to rail station to fetch them. Although I hadn’t been down past George St. since coming here, everything was so familiar. I hadn’t been there in 5 years, but I was in no doubt as to where everything was.
Yay mateys! I missed them. I took them back to the flat and then we went to the Lamb and Flag where Abbey was pubbing it up with the Wychwood contingent. They sang rude songs, put coasters in each other’s drinks, and variously engaged in roistering. Then we all trooped out for kebab.
I was very sneepy. Ian had to steer me home.
Gave ian and liana me comforter.
Spent a cold, sleepless, heart pounding night.
Sat Oct 20
Shiny morning. Rode the bus into town. There, we went to Oxfam, Blackwell’s Music, and Wadham. On campus we frolicked under the Lingering Tree and also in the chapel. Ian gave his harangue quite loud and boomingly, so that I was a little afraid the chaplain would come in and cry, “This is a house of God!” We also played in the organ. I photographed Ian and Liana frolicking in the Bar Quad, and Liana as Alice by the tiny inexplicable door, and Ian as the Libertine by the plaque for the Earl of Rochester, who course would be an alum of Wadham. We went to the covered market and stopped in Chocology for cocoa and Ritter.
At home we watched some Boosh and I had a nap.
I was awoken by Ian jumping onto my bed and abbey and Kelly bursting out of my closet. I didn’t get it until I saw the mars bar on my bedside table.
This jolly joke was based on the time when I read the sexy bits of Keat’s “Eve of St. Agnes” to everyone and instead of finding it slightly creepy and very atmospheric and romantic, as I do, they thought what Porphyro did was TOTALLY sketchy. So the running joke became the plying of sleeping girls with sweets, for some reason always mars bars.
Anyway, it was one of the most awesome things that anybody’s ever done to me, and considering it’s deviousness was probably Alex’s idea.
Chris came over with his guitar and at my request played “Redemption Song.” Ian played and sang “American Pie.” We all went to the chippy and played and sang again while we waited. The chippy was so pleased that he gave Ian and Chris their deep-fried mars bars for free. I got steak and kidney pie. And there was much rejoicing.
We all dressed up piratically for the undersea bop. I was old greg. On the way we saw Adam Ant. However, when we got there they would not let Ian and Liana in; they said guests were allowed in, but only if they’d been signed up ahead of time on the guest-list, which I’m sure is a new rule. I went in and had a look at the bop, but could find no-one to help. Back outside, Liana made quite a forceful case for letting them in, and asked if there was anyone we could speak to, but they said, it doesn’t matter bc the bop’s over. But of course I’d just been and it wasn’t over, in fact it was not over for at least another hour. Bah. Lies. So of course I went off with Ian and Liana and we got kebab and wandered off vaguely towards some intriguing lights in the sky. Then we got a call from abbey saying the bop was lame and where was kelly? So then everyone was lost and cold and the cab didn’t come for ages and we all froze. boo.
Sun Oct 21
Ian and Liana and I had a cuddly sleepover on the living room floor so I did not freeze.
Went to Wychwood. I fought Abbey and she declaimed the St. Crispin’s Day speech.
Gloucester Green, goodbye.
Love Ian and Liana. Miss them.
Kelly asked if I’d go to Pizza hut with her so she wouldn't feel bad about being so American. After, Chris took me to the Eagle and Child, which is a very good first date for an English student. I wasn’t hungry for food so I got sticky toffee pudding. We had quite a wonderful conversation. We talked about truth and lies, Grammar and history.
In the flat there was Alex, Abbey, Kelly, and David love. I sang “Morningtown Ride” for our lullaby.
MONDAY
Argh, I just finished horrible work, and now it stars AGAIN???
Tuesday
Coleridge’s Biographia Literaria is officially the most horrifying thing. There are of course more horrifying books, but none that I could ever be forced to read.
Horrible, horrible, horrible.
Doooooooooooooooooom.
Monday, 15 October 2007
Alors, we walked all down and up Cowley. It was all bright and full of people and felt all safe and downtowny. There were lights shaped like moons. We sat around in restaurants where the kebabs had grown thin and smelt of lamb and Indian music played. When we got back we surveyed our booty. There was pizza and tofu and curry and naan bread, donner kebab, and so much else. We also got a chicken for Alex, and what could only be invented in Britain: chips with baked beans and mayonnaise on. And I got us some baklawa from the middle eastern grocer, which was sooooo good it was like death, or being sick. Mmmmmm.
After that we all lay around on the floor.
Abbey and Kelly and Jemma and I, being girls, all got in a cuddle pile and Chris played us his acoustic guitar and played songs. It felt like it was the 60’s.
That’s another thing we did. A few days ago we made a fort out of the couch and blankets, and I got my disney princess torch and we managed to cram in and tell stories.
Another time we went to the king’s arms, which is our college’s pub -- our college had it’s own pub --and I got bangers and mash with onion gravy and ate it all. I won the prize of britishness that day. Another time we got fish and chips from our local chippy, and another time deep-fried mars bars. Oh, the things I have eaten since getting here. I don’t actually eat very much at all, bc I’m too poor to buy food, but when I do eat it’s always something horrifying like baked beans on chips. Or bread.
14 Oct.
Went into town eating the remnants of last night’s kebab. Sunny and beauteous. Wadham library: got a copy of Jane Eyre. The Oxford library system is confusing and impossible, but I’ve come to realize that if it’s a book that could possibly be taken in a feminist context, it will be in the sarah Lawrence section of the wadham library. Abbey and I went to Wychwood Warriors then. I was a bit shy again, but then I got to fighting with sticks and I really got on. I had one of the easiest, most genial conversation I’ve ever had, quite spontaneously and while trying to hit people with sticks. And I got to wear a helmet and I got to use a sword and it was so much fun to swing a blade at someone’s neck, you have no idea.
Kelly and I went to the co-op I got me some weetabix, some mushy peas, and a pineapple banana coconut smoothie. Then Abbey and me and David and Kelly sat around downstairs sort of working until late. I suppose I should actually work now. hmmm.
After that we all lay around on the floor.
Abbey and Kelly and Jemma and I, being girls, all got in a cuddle pile and Chris played us his acoustic guitar and played songs. It felt like it was the 60’s.
That’s another thing we did. A few days ago we made a fort out of the couch and blankets, and I got my disney princess torch and we managed to cram in and tell stories.
Another time we went to the king’s arms, which is our college’s pub -- our college had it’s own pub --and I got bangers and mash with onion gravy and ate it all. I won the prize of britishness that day. Another time we got fish and chips from our local chippy, and another time deep-fried mars bars. Oh, the things I have eaten since getting here. I don’t actually eat very much at all, bc I’m too poor to buy food, but when I do eat it’s always something horrifying like baked beans on chips. Or bread.
14 Oct.
Went into town eating the remnants of last night’s kebab. Sunny and beauteous. Wadham library: got a copy of Jane Eyre. The Oxford library system is confusing and impossible, but I’ve come to realize that if it’s a book that could possibly be taken in a feminist context, it will be in the sarah Lawrence section of the wadham library. Abbey and I went to Wychwood Warriors then. I was a bit shy again, but then I got to fighting with sticks and I really got on. I had one of the easiest, most genial conversation I’ve ever had, quite spontaneously and while trying to hit people with sticks. And I got to wear a helmet and I got to use a sword and it was so much fun to swing a blade at someone’s neck, you have no idea.
Kelly and I went to the co-op I got me some weetabix, some mushy peas, and a pineapple banana coconut smoothie. Then Abbey and me and David and Kelly sat around downstairs sort of working until late. I suppose I should actually work now. hmmm.
Saturday, 13 October 2007
Toga! Toga!
Monday 8th October
My first lecture, in the St. Cross Building! I thought it was Darwin and Literature, so imagine my horror when the dude started talking about industrialization and I realized I was stuck there. Apparently they switched it around without telling me, the bitches. But it was ok, bc it turned out to be quite interesting, bc industrialization and literature also reflects a bit on my current interests.
But then I had to go home and do work, as is getting critical.
9 Tuesday
Spent whole day on couch reading A Vindication of the Rights of Women. Ugh.
I liked the book, I was just tired of reading it by the end, so I just skimmed to last third.
Mary just wouldn’t stop bitching about vindicating our rights.
Isn’t that just like a woman.
10 Wednesday
Doom. Doooom. I just don’t have time to read the other books on my list. I’ll put them in my bibliography anyway.
Spent whole day on couch reading Caleb Williams. It was terrifying when I opened this little book and realized how tiny the type was. Fortunately it was quite a good and interesting book. There were some interesting parallels with Frankenstein.
Frantically wrote some rubbish about it, trying to splice in bits of Wollstonecraft as well. I don’t think it hung together at all well, but it sounds good and that’s what matters.
Took a break to walk around Cowley with Kelly. We went to Tesco’s and I bought pita and hummus and many good things.
Cowley road is as close as I can get around here to downtown new york. The grittier it is, the more at home I feel. It’s fabulous that here, even though we’re more or less in the country and Oxford is small, If I want greek food, or west Indian food, or Turkish, or polish, or anything, I can find it. I did go into the greek place and get some baklawa that made me happy.
Also, I hideously cut my hand open with the bread knife.
I bled a lot, all over Caleb Williams, too. I hope the library people don’t notice.
11 Thurs
14.30: essay due. To my pleasure, I didn’t have to read my essay aloud, Ballam read it aloud to me, which I think is actually better. When you read it yourself, let’s face it, you’re probably concentrating more on keeping your voice steady than on the overall composition. But he read it with lovely intonation, and, while making some criticism, of course, and taking some dramatic breaths during some of my more run-on sentences (which are most of them), he also said it had some good points. When we signed on the for the programme everyone was preparing us to have our essays torn apart and ravaged by the professors with the bloody jaws of contempt, but really he was quite nice, and gave me a 68, which is an A-. So I actually walked out of there feeling quite vain of my essay and how good it sounded and all.
Then I sat for a while with Hannah and Abbey in the garden and it was unreal and beautiful and Oxfordian. But then I had to go, bc I had a whole other essay to write for TOMORROW.
It will take a while to get used to this. I’m used to doing nothing for three months, then going mad and not eating or sleeping for three weeks. With this system, the minute I finish, it starts again. Barely have I finished one essay, when I have to begin another. I can’t decide if it’s worse, or better. At least it will never get crazier than it is now. It will always be like this, two essays a week.
We had dinner and Chris came over and played us some songs on his guitar which was lovely. Then they went to Cat Weazel but I couldn’t go bc I had to write my paper.
Poopie.
Thank God I’ve read Frankenstein before. I just couldn’t physically do it if I had to actually read the book.
And I actually spent most of the night procrastinating horribly.
12 Fri
Woke up early and actually wrote my paper. My tutorial was at 5pm so I had it done well ahead of time, but still. I promise I won’t leave it this late again. Besides, I want to have time to actually read the books next time. I do want to learn, after all. My paper was a little too personal although I made some really good points. It was not for nothing that Neil said, on the Frankenstein paper I wrote for him, that I cut right to the emotional core of the novel. I mean, if I can’t write about Frankenstein, what can I write about?
I read it to Professor Cunningham, naturally focusing more on the intonation of my voice than on the words, and he sat there and listened. Then he started talking about whether I thought it held together, and I started to stammer out some circuitous answer, but then I realized it was Frankenstein he thought was amateurish and didn’t hold together, not my paper at all! He said my paper did have unity and was good. That was all he said about my paper. From then on he rambled on and on about Shelley, Milton, the Gothic, everything, for at least half an hour. But that’s not to say it was boring. It was actually fascinating. I sat there and listened and was quite enthralled the whole time. It was great. It was like having my own personal lecture tailored to my interests.
Back at the flat, Abbey convinced me to come with her to the gym. I was skeptical bc it’s 50 quid to join and it’s not like I’ll ever have time during term.. But then it occurred to me that I could go during holidays after all, when nobody’s here and I’ve got no work and it’s cold and miserable, it might be good to go be mighty for a while. Anyway, it’s not like it’s my money or anything.
Then had naps, then got dressed for frat party. Jemma came in looking way hot as a slutty girl, Kelly was the feminist lesbian, and Abbey wore my cowboy boots and was a very american girl.
I wore my floaty peignoir, bc I wanted to be a frat boy, and in my mind it’s like a toga. It does have a greco-roman quality, surely. I brought also my little house on the prairie bonnet and my coonskin cap for dress-up purposes.
In the party flat people were playing beer pong with red plastic cups. It was a bit awkward at first. Then suddenly about a hundred people materialized from nowhere and there was no personal space left anywhere. I tried to make friends, but it was a bit hard, bc you couldn’t hear anything anyone said. I danced with Jemma. After a bit of shyness, I managed to gain the attention of a large group of people by telling the story of the French ambassador’s cannon, one of my favorite stories. Then I said they had to entertain me with a story about treacle.
But they got off on a tangent about kafka, which made me cross, bc I don’t want to hear about kafka!
But this one bloke finally had a story for me, and it went like this:
One morning a man woke up in his bed, only to discover that he had been transformed into treacle!
Isn’t that the best story of ALL TIME?? It was perfect! So then I hung out with Casey and Andy and spoke to this renaissance man from east London called fayyaz who told some jewish jokes and some welsh jokes since I was there and also this Welshman who had such a nice hat I swapped with him. Also we both love robert browning, me and fayyaz, that is, not me and the Welshman.
But everyone loves the welsh.
So then I was outside talking to Hannah and this very nice English girl and this very tall and French man. And I felt someone behind me grab hold of the coat of my peignor and quite deliberately tear it about a foot down my back.
I turned around, not quite able to believe it, and there was this drunk dude and girl who were laughing. I sort of stared. But then the dude reached and pulled my top down so I flashed everybody. It was quite fortunate that we were so situated that my back was to most people so I don’t think anyone saw. Even more gobsmacked, I pulled my top up and slapped his face, as hard as I could, both sides.
I went back to my flat, still quite stunned. Alex was there and I told him what happened and he went and kicked the cad out. I went upstairs and put on my dressing-gown which is thick silk and doesn't tear easily. Anyway, so Alex is my hero forever basically.
Eventually I felt better enough to go back out, where I and got hugs for my trials from Hannah and Abbey. Then Abbey and I went to bed.
13 Sat
Sat in bed to update my journal. I think I’m just going to putter about and do household things to-day, and get me books to-morrow. Jemma came up and gave a beautiful gold box of Fairtrade Begian chocolates. She said she had heard about me being attacked by the bodice-ripper. Isn’t that the sweetest thing in the history of the world?? Of course, it was traumatizing at the time, but just silly in retrospect. Although the peinoir is vintage and irreplaceable, it’s still just clothes, after all, and although I was humiliated, the combination of me slapping him and Alex booting him out satisfies my honour. So it’s okay. But chocolates also helped a lot. I think they are the most appreciated choccies I’ve ever gotten from anyone, anytime, seriously.
I love Jemma. I can’t believe I only just met her.
But I must sort out my room and that, for to-night we are going to explore Cowley and have takeout night.
Huzzah!
My first lecture, in the St. Cross Building! I thought it was Darwin and Literature, so imagine my horror when the dude started talking about industrialization and I realized I was stuck there. Apparently they switched it around without telling me, the bitches. But it was ok, bc it turned out to be quite interesting, bc industrialization and literature also reflects a bit on my current interests.
But then I had to go home and do work, as is getting critical.
9 Tuesday
Spent whole day on couch reading A Vindication of the Rights of Women. Ugh.
I liked the book, I was just tired of reading it by the end, so I just skimmed to last third.
Mary just wouldn’t stop bitching about vindicating our rights.
Isn’t that just like a woman.
10 Wednesday
Doom. Doooom. I just don’t have time to read the other books on my list. I’ll put them in my bibliography anyway.
Spent whole day on couch reading Caleb Williams. It was terrifying when I opened this little book and realized how tiny the type was. Fortunately it was quite a good and interesting book. There were some interesting parallels with Frankenstein.
Frantically wrote some rubbish about it, trying to splice in bits of Wollstonecraft as well. I don’t think it hung together at all well, but it sounds good and that’s what matters.
Took a break to walk around Cowley with Kelly. We went to Tesco’s and I bought pita and hummus and many good things.
Cowley road is as close as I can get around here to downtown new york. The grittier it is, the more at home I feel. It’s fabulous that here, even though we’re more or less in the country and Oxford is small, If I want greek food, or west Indian food, or Turkish, or polish, or anything, I can find it. I did go into the greek place and get some baklawa that made me happy.
Also, I hideously cut my hand open with the bread knife.
I bled a lot, all over Caleb Williams, too. I hope the library people don’t notice.
11 Thurs
14.30: essay due. To my pleasure, I didn’t have to read my essay aloud, Ballam read it aloud to me, which I think is actually better. When you read it yourself, let’s face it, you’re probably concentrating more on keeping your voice steady than on the overall composition. But he read it with lovely intonation, and, while making some criticism, of course, and taking some dramatic breaths during some of my more run-on sentences (which are most of them), he also said it had some good points. When we signed on the for the programme everyone was preparing us to have our essays torn apart and ravaged by the professors with the bloody jaws of contempt, but really he was quite nice, and gave me a 68, which is an A-. So I actually walked out of there feeling quite vain of my essay and how good it sounded and all.
Then I sat for a while with Hannah and Abbey in the garden and it was unreal and beautiful and Oxfordian. But then I had to go, bc I had a whole other essay to write for TOMORROW.
It will take a while to get used to this. I’m used to doing nothing for three months, then going mad and not eating or sleeping for three weeks. With this system, the minute I finish, it starts again. Barely have I finished one essay, when I have to begin another. I can’t decide if it’s worse, or better. At least it will never get crazier than it is now. It will always be like this, two essays a week.
We had dinner and Chris came over and played us some songs on his guitar which was lovely. Then they went to Cat Weazel but I couldn’t go bc I had to write my paper.
Poopie.
Thank God I’ve read Frankenstein before. I just couldn’t physically do it if I had to actually read the book.
And I actually spent most of the night procrastinating horribly.
12 Fri
Woke up early and actually wrote my paper. My tutorial was at 5pm so I had it done well ahead of time, but still. I promise I won’t leave it this late again. Besides, I want to have time to actually read the books next time. I do want to learn, after all. My paper was a little too personal although I made some really good points. It was not for nothing that Neil said, on the Frankenstein paper I wrote for him, that I cut right to the emotional core of the novel. I mean, if I can’t write about Frankenstein, what can I write about?
I read it to Professor Cunningham, naturally focusing more on the intonation of my voice than on the words, and he sat there and listened. Then he started talking about whether I thought it held together, and I started to stammer out some circuitous answer, but then I realized it was Frankenstein he thought was amateurish and didn’t hold together, not my paper at all! He said my paper did have unity and was good. That was all he said about my paper. From then on he rambled on and on about Shelley, Milton, the Gothic, everything, for at least half an hour. But that’s not to say it was boring. It was actually fascinating. I sat there and listened and was quite enthralled the whole time. It was great. It was like having my own personal lecture tailored to my interests.
Back at the flat, Abbey convinced me to come with her to the gym. I was skeptical bc it’s 50 quid to join and it’s not like I’ll ever have time during term.. But then it occurred to me that I could go during holidays after all, when nobody’s here and I’ve got no work and it’s cold and miserable, it might be good to go be mighty for a while. Anyway, it’s not like it’s my money or anything.
Then had naps, then got dressed for frat party. Jemma came in looking way hot as a slutty girl, Kelly was the feminist lesbian, and Abbey wore my cowboy boots and was a very american girl.
I wore my floaty peignoir, bc I wanted to be a frat boy, and in my mind it’s like a toga. It does have a greco-roman quality, surely. I brought also my little house on the prairie bonnet and my coonskin cap for dress-up purposes.
In the party flat people were playing beer pong with red plastic cups. It was a bit awkward at first. Then suddenly about a hundred people materialized from nowhere and there was no personal space left anywhere. I tried to make friends, but it was a bit hard, bc you couldn’t hear anything anyone said. I danced with Jemma. After a bit of shyness, I managed to gain the attention of a large group of people by telling the story of the French ambassador’s cannon, one of my favorite stories. Then I said they had to entertain me with a story about treacle.
But they got off on a tangent about kafka, which made me cross, bc I don’t want to hear about kafka!
But this one bloke finally had a story for me, and it went like this:
One morning a man woke up in his bed, only to discover that he had been transformed into treacle!
Isn’t that the best story of ALL TIME?? It was perfect! So then I hung out with Casey and Andy and spoke to this renaissance man from east London called fayyaz who told some jewish jokes and some welsh jokes since I was there and also this Welshman who had such a nice hat I swapped with him. Also we both love robert browning, me and fayyaz, that is, not me and the Welshman.
But everyone loves the welsh.
So then I was outside talking to Hannah and this very nice English girl and this very tall and French man. And I felt someone behind me grab hold of the coat of my peignor and quite deliberately tear it about a foot down my back.
I turned around, not quite able to believe it, and there was this drunk dude and girl who were laughing. I sort of stared. But then the dude reached and pulled my top down so I flashed everybody. It was quite fortunate that we were so situated that my back was to most people so I don’t think anyone saw. Even more gobsmacked, I pulled my top up and slapped his face, as hard as I could, both sides.
I went back to my flat, still quite stunned. Alex was there and I told him what happened and he went and kicked the cad out. I went upstairs and put on my dressing-gown which is thick silk and doesn't tear easily. Anyway, so Alex is my hero forever basically.
Eventually I felt better enough to go back out, where I and got hugs for my trials from Hannah and Abbey. Then Abbey and I went to bed.
13 Sat
Sat in bed to update my journal. I think I’m just going to putter about and do household things to-day, and get me books to-morrow. Jemma came up and gave a beautiful gold box of Fairtrade Begian chocolates. She said she had heard about me being attacked by the bodice-ripper. Isn’t that the sweetest thing in the history of the world?? Of course, it was traumatizing at the time, but just silly in retrospect. Although the peinoir is vintage and irreplaceable, it’s still just clothes, after all, and although I was humiliated, the combination of me slapping him and Alex booting him out satisfies my honour. So it’s okay. But chocolates also helped a lot. I think they are the most appreciated choccies I’ve ever gotten from anyone, anytime, seriously.
I love Jemma. I can’t believe I only just met her.
But I must sort out my room and that, for to-night we are going to explore Cowley and have takeout night.
Huzzah!
Not you, naan bread.
Here is more stuff I've done. It's probably out of sequence. I don't care.
Saturday, September 29th
9am coach to London. We went to the Tower of London and had a tour by a quite amusing Beefeater who told us lots of bloody stories. Abbey and I went to the café and I got a cocoa and a little strawberry jelly. I ate me jelly and then we went on a boat up the Thames, which was beautiful. We passed under many bridges, and saw the Globe, the Eye and many other things. I waved at people on bridges. The Tower Bridge is the most beautiful bridge. We got off at the Houses of Parliament, where we went through all this security and then had a tour. It’s odd to think we were walking around where the MP’s and the PM and the Queen hang out. After that we explored London on our own. I got a sausage roll and Cornish pasty which was heaven. We wandered around and actually ran into Carnaby Street, which had been sadly gentrified, but I still thought it was cool. I love London. It’s a beautiful city. I very much enjoyed walking around in the skeezy parts of town. The more like the Lower East Side a place is, the more I like it.
Despite myself I had to think of Wordsworth's Bliss it was in that dawn to be alive, but to be young was very heaven. It was nice to think that we are young and cool and Absolute Beginners and King of the Mods right now.
After that we crammed onto a rush hour Tube and met a whole bunch of other people and walked around looking for a pub. It had to just right, dim, full of cobwebs, and the sort of place where when we walked in the music would stop and everyone would turn and look at us, and someone would tell us to keep off the moors. Eventually we found one that was a freemason pub. Seriously. They were probably slaughtering goats right under our feet. We ordered chips and everyone got drinkies. Then we walked back in the nighttime. We were looking for the coach but I got separated from the others and after a while I called Alex and asked where everyone was and then we all got back together and got on the bus. I was happy and content and in love with creation.
Sunday, September 30th
Fresher’s introduction in the JCR. The Wadham Freshers all seemed very young. I felt quite awkward, as most of us did, I imagine. There were icebreakers, by literally breaking frozen t-shirts. They gave us Wadham Freshers polos. We also all got cards and had to find those of us with the same one. Everyone seemed to find lots of people with their same card, but in the whole crowd I only found one solitary person with my card. We had to shout to talk. He asked where I was from and I yelled America. Where was he from? Iran. “Aww!” I bellowed. “Let’s be friends!” and gave him a hug. He vanished after a while though. It’s too bad because I wanted to be friends with him. I met some other very nice people though.
Monday, October 1st
Address by the Warden in the Holywell Music Room. I was late and missed it. But I ran into Claire and she took me and some others up to her room and gave us tea. Then there was the Student Union address, and lunch with our college parents and siblings. I didn’t really click with my college family, I have to say. There wasn’t anything very interesting about them and they didn’t seem interested in me. Also I was very tired. They took us to a nice little restaurant called Puccini’s however, and I got hummus and pita, which was excellent ‘cos I gots to have my hummus.
Tuesday, 2nd October
10 am. Health and Welfare talk, college doctors. I skipped it, being under the impression that a good night’s sleep might aid my welfare. Wadham Library Induction. It’s so different from the libraries I’m used to. It’s open 24/7 without librarians always being there, you could just live there if you wanted, and the books are self-checkout on an honor system, for goodness’ sakes. Then I went to the virgin megastore and made a very self-indulgent unnecessary debit-card purchase: the first 2 seasons of THE MIGHTY BOOSH.
Met Dr. John Ballam above Starbucks. He’s v. unpretentious and such a nice man. I’m to read Godwin and Wollstonecraft for starters.
I’ve been infecting everyone I can with the Mighty Boosh. It’s the greatest show in the history of mankind and is basically a visual representation of the inside of my head. Charlie said it’s not so very well known even here, and no Americans know of it. So I’ve been spreading its madness by viewings. Our flat is so cute and domestic. Abbey or Chris or David will make some elaborate dinner, then we’ll all sit on the couch and watch the Boosh. And Jemma or Kelly or Chris will come over and watch with us.
Wed 3rd October
Unfortunately seem to have come down with something. Ugh. I knew I was going to get the horrible lurgy. I knew it.
We went into town for the Foam Party but didn’t actually end up going. We just hung out in the JCR. Then Abbey, Chris and Alex and I walked home in a circuitous manner, stopping for a donner from a kebab van.
Kebab vans: the reason why the UK is amazing.
Thurs 4
OUSU Undergraduate Fresher’s Fair, Examination Schools.
Madness. So many people, so many signs, words, ack. Signed up for a bunch of literary, arty, jewy things. went to OUSU and bought a nice spiky plant named Spike for our flat.
Then I was soooo tired. I could barely drag myself home. It was literal hell. I must be walking about a million miles a day.
That night I went to Simchat Torah at Chabad on George St. I was counting on Chabad to replace Sarah Lawrence Hillel for me, except it’s nothing like at all. It’s quite conservative, there was a curtain between the men and the women. I don’t mind being separate from the men, but the Rabbi and the Torah were on the men’s side, and I felt like I was expected to sit with the children and chat. I just want to pray, and sing, and then eat, if that’s not too much to ask.
I had a pretty nice time chatting, though, had some challah, and even danced a little with the women.
I really just a want a big hug from my own Rabbi, and my own slc Hillel Shabbat.
Fri 5
Met the infamous Professor Valentine Cunningham. When I told Ballam he was my other tutor he put his head in his hands, not a good sign, and said he was very eccentric and doesn’t really know anyone else exists.
I had to find Corpus Christi, which is a very beautiful college, and sat in a lovely garden while I waited for 3 o’clock.
Professor Cunningham turned out to be really awesome. He flitted about his office, which is covered in books from floor to ceilings, and told me to read Frankenstein.
Excellent.
Also, MR. FLIBBLE CAME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Finally!! I was so happy, I went everywhere with him for hours.
That night we got dressed up for the School Uniform Bop. It was much, much better than a sarah Lawrence dance bc 1. people actually came, and 2. people actually danced. They played awesome music from our middle school days like aqua and the spice girls and it was great. It was close and sweaty and everything a dance should be. Outside cooling off I spoke about piracy with some dude. I probably only succeeded in weirding him out, to be honest.
I did the Hammer dance.
Saturday, 6th October
National Mad Hatter Day.
Me and Abbey went to Sainsbury’s yesterday for Mcvities, custard, garlic naan, clotted cream, bake wells, and other Tea things. We kept saying “not you, naan bread,” until we were mad.
So today we made things for High Tea. Abbey made wonderful currant scones. I made apple crumble with custard. Then people came and brought many nummy things.
We ate them until we were sick and decided to plan a frat party.
In more important news, it transpires that Jemma had the complete box set of Red Dwarf. Yaaa! So exiting. So for the past few nights we have been watching about an episode a day. I love that show.
Still suffering from the horrible throat lurgy.
I was coughing my lungs out and it wasn’t cool. I went to the co-op I hopes of finding some Nyquil, but there was only some weird cough syrup called benylin, which frankly I don’t actually think is a cough suppressant at all. I also got a steak and kidney pie, and horlicks.
But really I just want Nyquil. What is so hard about having Nyquil, people??
Sunday 7th October
Went with Abbey to this Anglo-Saxon reenactment group she signed up for. I sort of noticed the man in a tunic with a shield and that at the Fresher’s Fair, but for some reason it didn’t register with me.
We went to the University Parks where there was a whole crowd of people with swords and shields in anglo-saxon dress standing looking awesome. I expected Simon Schama to walk up any minute and start talking about Hastings.
We were taught to fight with sticks, swords, and spears. My favorite was sticks because you can hit harder with them. It was loads of fun. We all walked to a pub then. I shuffled in leaves and that was fun.
Apparently all the Warrior people do is battle, then sit around in pubs singing filthy songs, and drinking, or watching the princess bride and drinking, and singing more filthy songs and drinking.
In short, they’re awesome.
Abbey wanted to stay with them, so we stayed after all the other newbies went away, and got kebab with them. I got mixed meat kebab with garlic naan bread.
Not you, naan bread.
And I had a lucazade, to complete the boosh references.
Then Abbey and I went to the inklings meeting, which was great. I was afraid they’d be really pretentious, but one piece they read was cheesy fantasy and the other humour, so I’m set.
Saturday, September 29th
9am coach to London. We went to the Tower of London and had a tour by a quite amusing Beefeater who told us lots of bloody stories. Abbey and I went to the café and I got a cocoa and a little strawberry jelly. I ate me jelly and then we went on a boat up the Thames, which was beautiful. We passed under many bridges, and saw the Globe, the Eye and many other things. I waved at people on bridges. The Tower Bridge is the most beautiful bridge. We got off at the Houses of Parliament, where we went through all this security and then had a tour. It’s odd to think we were walking around where the MP’s and the PM and the Queen hang out. After that we explored London on our own. I got a sausage roll and Cornish pasty which was heaven. We wandered around and actually ran into Carnaby Street, which had been sadly gentrified, but I still thought it was cool. I love London. It’s a beautiful city. I very much enjoyed walking around in the skeezy parts of town. The more like the Lower East Side a place is, the more I like it.
Despite myself I had to think of Wordsworth's Bliss it was in that dawn to be alive, but to be young was very heaven. It was nice to think that we are young and cool and Absolute Beginners and King of the Mods right now.
After that we crammed onto a rush hour Tube and met a whole bunch of other people and walked around looking for a pub. It had to just right, dim, full of cobwebs, and the sort of place where when we walked in the music would stop and everyone would turn and look at us, and someone would tell us to keep off the moors. Eventually we found one that was a freemason pub. Seriously. They were probably slaughtering goats right under our feet. We ordered chips and everyone got drinkies. Then we walked back in the nighttime. We were looking for the coach but I got separated from the others and after a while I called Alex and asked where everyone was and then we all got back together and got on the bus. I was happy and content and in love with creation.
Sunday, September 30th
Fresher’s introduction in the JCR. The Wadham Freshers all seemed very young. I felt quite awkward, as most of us did, I imagine. There were icebreakers, by literally breaking frozen t-shirts. They gave us Wadham Freshers polos. We also all got cards and had to find those of us with the same one. Everyone seemed to find lots of people with their same card, but in the whole crowd I only found one solitary person with my card. We had to shout to talk. He asked where I was from and I yelled America. Where was he from? Iran. “Aww!” I bellowed. “Let’s be friends!” and gave him a hug. He vanished after a while though. It’s too bad because I wanted to be friends with him. I met some other very nice people though.
Monday, October 1st
Address by the Warden in the Holywell Music Room. I was late and missed it. But I ran into Claire and she took me and some others up to her room and gave us tea. Then there was the Student Union address, and lunch with our college parents and siblings. I didn’t really click with my college family, I have to say. There wasn’t anything very interesting about them and they didn’t seem interested in me. Also I was very tired. They took us to a nice little restaurant called Puccini’s however, and I got hummus and pita, which was excellent ‘cos I gots to have my hummus.
Tuesday, 2nd October
10 am. Health and Welfare talk, college doctors. I skipped it, being under the impression that a good night’s sleep might aid my welfare. Wadham Library Induction. It’s so different from the libraries I’m used to. It’s open 24/7 without librarians always being there, you could just live there if you wanted, and the books are self-checkout on an honor system, for goodness’ sakes. Then I went to the virgin megastore and made a very self-indulgent unnecessary debit-card purchase: the first 2 seasons of THE MIGHTY BOOSH.
Met Dr. John Ballam above Starbucks. He’s v. unpretentious and such a nice man. I’m to read Godwin and Wollstonecraft for starters.
I’ve been infecting everyone I can with the Mighty Boosh. It’s the greatest show in the history of mankind and is basically a visual representation of the inside of my head. Charlie said it’s not so very well known even here, and no Americans know of it. So I’ve been spreading its madness by viewings. Our flat is so cute and domestic. Abbey or Chris or David will make some elaborate dinner, then we’ll all sit on the couch and watch the Boosh. And Jemma or Kelly or Chris will come over and watch with us.
Wed 3rd October
Unfortunately seem to have come down with something. Ugh. I knew I was going to get the horrible lurgy. I knew it.
We went into town for the Foam Party but didn’t actually end up going. We just hung out in the JCR. Then Abbey, Chris and Alex and I walked home in a circuitous manner, stopping for a donner from a kebab van.
Kebab vans: the reason why the UK is amazing.
Thurs 4
OUSU Undergraduate Fresher’s Fair, Examination Schools.
Madness. So many people, so many signs, words, ack. Signed up for a bunch of literary, arty, jewy things. went to OUSU and bought a nice spiky plant named Spike for our flat.
Then I was soooo tired. I could barely drag myself home. It was literal hell. I must be walking about a million miles a day.
That night I went to Simchat Torah at Chabad on George St. I was counting on Chabad to replace Sarah Lawrence Hillel for me, except it’s nothing like at all. It’s quite conservative, there was a curtain between the men and the women. I don’t mind being separate from the men, but the Rabbi and the Torah were on the men’s side, and I felt like I was expected to sit with the children and chat. I just want to pray, and sing, and then eat, if that’s not too much to ask.
I had a pretty nice time chatting, though, had some challah, and even danced a little with the women.
I really just a want a big hug from my own Rabbi, and my own slc Hillel Shabbat.
Fri 5
Met the infamous Professor Valentine Cunningham. When I told Ballam he was my other tutor he put his head in his hands, not a good sign, and said he was very eccentric and doesn’t really know anyone else exists.
I had to find Corpus Christi, which is a very beautiful college, and sat in a lovely garden while I waited for 3 o’clock.
Professor Cunningham turned out to be really awesome. He flitted about his office, which is covered in books from floor to ceilings, and told me to read Frankenstein.
Excellent.
Also, MR. FLIBBLE CAME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Finally!! I was so happy, I went everywhere with him for hours.
That night we got dressed up for the School Uniform Bop. It was much, much better than a sarah Lawrence dance bc 1. people actually came, and 2. people actually danced. They played awesome music from our middle school days like aqua and the spice girls and it was great. It was close and sweaty and everything a dance should be. Outside cooling off I spoke about piracy with some dude. I probably only succeeded in weirding him out, to be honest.
I did the Hammer dance.
Saturday, 6th October
National Mad Hatter Day.
Me and Abbey went to Sainsbury’s yesterday for Mcvities, custard, garlic naan, clotted cream, bake wells, and other Tea things. We kept saying “not you, naan bread,” until we were mad.
So today we made things for High Tea. Abbey made wonderful currant scones. I made apple crumble with custard. Then people came and brought many nummy things.
We ate them until we were sick and decided to plan a frat party.
In more important news, it transpires that Jemma had the complete box set of Red Dwarf. Yaaa! So exiting. So for the past few nights we have been watching about an episode a day. I love that show.
Still suffering from the horrible throat lurgy.
I was coughing my lungs out and it wasn’t cool. I went to the co-op I hopes of finding some Nyquil, but there was only some weird cough syrup called benylin, which frankly I don’t actually think is a cough suppressant at all. I also got a steak and kidney pie, and horlicks.
But really I just want Nyquil. What is so hard about having Nyquil, people??
Sunday 7th October
Went with Abbey to this Anglo-Saxon reenactment group she signed up for. I sort of noticed the man in a tunic with a shield and that at the Fresher’s Fair, but for some reason it didn’t register with me.
We went to the University Parks where there was a whole crowd of people with swords and shields in anglo-saxon dress standing looking awesome. I expected Simon Schama to walk up any minute and start talking about Hastings.
We were taught to fight with sticks, swords, and spears. My favorite was sticks because you can hit harder with them. It was loads of fun. We all walked to a pub then. I shuffled in leaves and that was fun.
Apparently all the Warrior people do is battle, then sit around in pubs singing filthy songs, and drinking, or watching the princess bride and drinking, and singing more filthy songs and drinking.
In short, they’re awesome.
Abbey wanted to stay with them, so we stayed after all the other newbies went away, and got kebab with them. I got mixed meat kebab with garlic naan bread.
Not you, naan bread.
And I had a lucazade, to complete the boosh references.
Then Abbey and I went to the inklings meeting, which was great. I was afraid they’d be really pretentious, but one piece they read was cheesy fantasy and the other humour, so I’m set.
Tuesday, 2 October 2007
catching up
Here tis me blog thing. I personally don't get blogs cos I don't know why anyone really cares about me going to the shops or whatever, but since I am away from the dear mateys, I have made this sos they can hear of my adventures without me having to repeat myself.
alors, here is all the things that have happened so far:
25.9.07
19.15 hours.
Had lovely time in SLC. At the v. beginning and v. end of the year SLC is more than edenic, it is Eden. Beautiful people lying out on the grass in the sun, surrounded by trees heavy with foliage.
On Friday I went to services, and the pre-services Feast.
It’s as if you are a washcloth that has to be thoroughly washed and beaten and wrung out, and then you are clean and feel better. I was in services from 10 am to one pm. Then again from 4.30 to 7.
I was happy and loved everyone.
I swinged a little in my peep-toe polka-dot pumps. I went to the pub for drinkies.
The next day I was in stop n’ shop in my completely see-through peignoir buying five different kinds of chocolate.
Swore at drivers in Yonkers.
Watched rock of love, a show that, in my opinion, is absolute proof of the doomed nature of our society.
Me and mummy met with my banker Paul, who is so adorable. He’s a mancunian, so is accent is perfect. And he was very helpful with bank stuff too.
Drove to Queens.
They didn’t call my mammoth bags on being overweight, amazingly.
Said bye to Mummy.
And was alone in JFK. I went to a café, where this cute Australian flirted with me and I got a masala chai latte which tasted just like Mummy’s gingersnaps. So I felt pretty hopeful after that. I changed my money, and then I was on the plane, and we were off, and circling over Queens, which at night and from above is the most surreally gorgeous thing.
It was very At least that abandon.
I had supper and watched some POTC. At BA you can now make your own customized playlist of music for your journey. I made one largely new wave and 60’s and very simon & garfunkle, naturally.
I barely slept, but managed to sleep through breakfast. Rargh.
Watched some JAWS. Looked at the clouds.
Terminal four was really short this time!
I can’t believe it!
I got my bags and through everything hassle-free, onto the coach, and soon enough we’re in Oxford, and everything is familiar.
Wadham is a beautiful college. I can’t believe I’m going here. I walked right past it plenty of times when I was 17, thinking how cool it would be to be a student at the Uni, never dreaming it would actually come true. There was a lady waiting for me named Charlie who gave me biscuits and called me cab. Our neighbourhood of Iffley Rd seemed a little ghetto, and our flat was cheap, but nice, clean, with a living room, couches, shelves, washer, kitchen with all the amenities, utensils, and bathrooms with showers and that. My room is not littler than the average dorm room, with a nice view out a really big window, and a fourpost bed, closet, and full-length mirror, which is what counts. I unpacked some, then Abbey came in and asked if I wanted to go exploring for food. We walked down High Street into town.
Eventually we wound up on Cornmarket street and bought lunch at Pret a manger. It was everywhere lovely, old architecture, and leaves blowing about, bc although in ny it had been 90 degrees and steaming, here it was proper autumn and quite cold.
We decided to go back a different way, past St. Catherine's and Magdalen, and ended up getting lost. We tried to cut through magdalen, which is all fenced and walled and guarded like a fortress, but somehow we got in, and wandered around trying to find our way out. We saw a heron, and climbed a woodpile to get over a fence, and I got nettled! Like a noob!
HATE nettles.
Then there was a river, and the bridge had a gate and iron spikes so no-one could get out. I began to fear we had inadvertently wandered into not a college, but a lunatic asylum. We crawled through a hole in a fence which had barbed wire on the top, for chrissake, and saw four men playing Frisbee. They all spoke in turn, and I realized they all had Australian accents. They seemed friendly, however, nor fazed by our intrusion, and told us the way out.
Past the nest of Australians was a strange corridor where an alarm sounded continually, and a man on bridge scribbled in a notebook. I began to be concerned that this was some kind of island of doctor moreau thing. Another man came upon us, then, and unlocked a fence and showed us the way out. He was not Australian, however. He sounded more polish.
Home! I had a nap. Then was pizza party in 2. Many mateys.
when we got back, my flat mates and I stayed up till nine, trying to fix our jet lag. We just sat about in the kitchen and talked.
So that was nice.
Friday, September 28th, 12.10 AM
Listening to: Gut Feeling, Devo.
Walked into town with Alex. There was an introductory talk in the Okinaga Room, then we had lunch. It’s good that they keep feeding us, that way we don’t have to spend money on food. But I found something well worth spending money on. After lunch we went to Blackwell’s! I wanted EVERYTHING. Misery that I am so poor.
Then we had guided tours. The weather was so nice, quite cold, with alternating faint showers and sun. we got to go in the sheldonian theatre. It was quite amazing.
Afters, we went into Orange to buy phones. The interior of Orange is painfully hip and it is staffed entirely by people who look like the king of the mods. I was very intimidated and ended up buying a phone I don’t really want. I really only want my own phone, to be honest.
To top that, the internet STILL isn’t working. Rargh. When I realized that, it was the most upset I’ve been since I arrived.
We took the bus back. It’s not expensive, but I really can’t afford to be taking it all the time, plus why do it when you’ve got perfectly good legs?
I felt quite morally superior when I saw some others taking cabs to the wine reception while we waited at the bus stop in our smart dress like proper working-class people.
Although this is Oxford's commie school, of late I have been more and more possessed of a strange bourgeoise passion.
looking at the rows of little houses out the window at night, with their gardens and all, is my English middle-class dream. I just want to be out there with my wellies mucking about with Postman Pat. Or the Jolly Postman. Or at least a vet.
Anyway, we missed the bus and were a bit late to the reception, but it was ok. I even succeeded in mingling adequately, and mercifully it was over soon. Then we trooped off to the Hall, which was very Hogwarts, and had supper. It was all yummy and I actually think my table etiquette was exactly right, even to how you’re supposed to tear of little bits of your roll and butter them individually. I sat next to Kelly. Across from us was a young economics professor who talked literally the entire time, nonstop, about economics to the poor girl next to him.
The professor next to Kelly was a wonderful caricature of a british academic, in his black robe, and he kept saying awesome things to her, such as what was her favorite period? (historical, I presume), and coerced her into eating her veg by saying they were full of antioxidants and good for the bowels. He was SO cool. I wish I’d been sitting next to him.
Kelly’s tutor was the coolest professor at the whole Uni, however. He has a round red face, crazy white flyaway hair that stands straight up, a watch on a chain, a yellow bow tie, and the most extravagant manner. AND he is an astronomer. I cannot express his awesomeness. I totally wish he were my tutor. But Debbie pointed out one of mine, and we ended up catching each other’s eye and having an odd sort of wave down the table.
He came up after. His name is Dr. John Ballam, and he seems really nice. It turns out I share him with Abbey.
The Warden gave a speech, and he was also really cute and stereotypical. I loved them all, the dusty old professors.
So there we were, at Oxford, sitting at this long table, under the paintings of Wren and everybody, with the candles and the professors in their gowns. It was insane. Half the time Kelly and me just giggled and tried to figure out how to open the water bottle, which was some kind of engineering marvel.
MAD.
Apres, everyone went to the college bar for drinks, but we Kelly and I didn’t want drinks, we wanted INTERNETS. So they showed us where the computer room was, and so we had EMAIL and FACEBOOK and it was wonderful.
But then, of course, we had to take the bus home in the night.
alors, here is all the things that have happened so far:
25.9.07
19.15 hours.
Had lovely time in SLC. At the v. beginning and v. end of the year SLC is more than edenic, it is Eden. Beautiful people lying out on the grass in the sun, surrounded by trees heavy with foliage.
On Friday I went to services, and the pre-services Feast.
It’s as if you are a washcloth that has to be thoroughly washed and beaten and wrung out, and then you are clean and feel better. I was in services from 10 am to one pm. Then again from 4.30 to 7.
I was happy and loved everyone.
I swinged a little in my peep-toe polka-dot pumps. I went to the pub for drinkies.
The next day I was in stop n’ shop in my completely see-through peignoir buying five different kinds of chocolate.
Swore at drivers in Yonkers.
Watched rock of love, a show that, in my opinion, is absolute proof of the doomed nature of our society.
Me and mummy met with my banker Paul, who is so adorable. He’s a mancunian, so is accent is perfect. And he was very helpful with bank stuff too.
Drove to Queens.
They didn’t call my mammoth bags on being overweight, amazingly.
Said bye to Mummy.
And was alone in JFK. I went to a café, where this cute Australian flirted with me and I got a masala chai latte which tasted just like Mummy’s gingersnaps. So I felt pretty hopeful after that. I changed my money, and then I was on the plane, and we were off, and circling over Queens, which at night and from above is the most surreally gorgeous thing.
It was very At least that abandon.
I had supper and watched some POTC. At BA you can now make your own customized playlist of music for your journey. I made one largely new wave and 60’s and very simon & garfunkle, naturally.
I barely slept, but managed to sleep through breakfast. Rargh.
Watched some JAWS. Looked at the clouds.
Terminal four was really short this time!
I can’t believe it!
I got my bags and through everything hassle-free, onto the coach, and soon enough we’re in Oxford, and everything is familiar.
Wadham is a beautiful college. I can’t believe I’m going here. I walked right past it plenty of times when I was 17, thinking how cool it would be to be a student at the Uni, never dreaming it would actually come true. There was a lady waiting for me named Charlie who gave me biscuits and called me cab. Our neighbourhood of Iffley Rd seemed a little ghetto, and our flat was cheap, but nice, clean, with a living room, couches, shelves, washer, kitchen with all the amenities, utensils, and bathrooms with showers and that. My room is not littler than the average dorm room, with a nice view out a really big window, and a fourpost bed, closet, and full-length mirror, which is what counts. I unpacked some, then Abbey came in and asked if I wanted to go exploring for food. We walked down High Street into town.
Eventually we wound up on Cornmarket street and bought lunch at Pret a manger. It was everywhere lovely, old architecture, and leaves blowing about, bc although in ny it had been 90 degrees and steaming, here it was proper autumn and quite cold.
We decided to go back a different way, past St. Catherine's and Magdalen, and ended up getting lost. We tried to cut through magdalen, which is all fenced and walled and guarded like a fortress, but somehow we got in, and wandered around trying to find our way out. We saw a heron, and climbed a woodpile to get over a fence, and I got nettled! Like a noob!
HATE nettles.
Then there was a river, and the bridge had a gate and iron spikes so no-one could get out. I began to fear we had inadvertently wandered into not a college, but a lunatic asylum. We crawled through a hole in a fence which had barbed wire on the top, for chrissake, and saw four men playing Frisbee. They all spoke in turn, and I realized they all had Australian accents. They seemed friendly, however, nor fazed by our intrusion, and told us the way out.
Past the nest of Australians was a strange corridor where an alarm sounded continually, and a man on bridge scribbled in a notebook. I began to be concerned that this was some kind of island of doctor moreau thing. Another man came upon us, then, and unlocked a fence and showed us the way out. He was not Australian, however. He sounded more polish.
Home! I had a nap. Then was pizza party in 2. Many mateys.
when we got back, my flat mates and I stayed up till nine, trying to fix our jet lag. We just sat about in the kitchen and talked.
So that was nice.
Friday, September 28th, 12.10 AM
Listening to: Gut Feeling, Devo.
Walked into town with Alex. There was an introductory talk in the Okinaga Room, then we had lunch. It’s good that they keep feeding us, that way we don’t have to spend money on food. But I found something well worth spending money on. After lunch we went to Blackwell’s! I wanted EVERYTHING. Misery that I am so poor.
Then we had guided tours. The weather was so nice, quite cold, with alternating faint showers and sun. we got to go in the sheldonian theatre. It was quite amazing.
Afters, we went into Orange to buy phones. The interior of Orange is painfully hip and it is staffed entirely by people who look like the king of the mods. I was very intimidated and ended up buying a phone I don’t really want. I really only want my own phone, to be honest.
To top that, the internet STILL isn’t working. Rargh. When I realized that, it was the most upset I’ve been since I arrived.
We took the bus back. It’s not expensive, but I really can’t afford to be taking it all the time, plus why do it when you’ve got perfectly good legs?
I felt quite morally superior when I saw some others taking cabs to the wine reception while we waited at the bus stop in our smart dress like proper working-class people.
Although this is Oxford's commie school, of late I have been more and more possessed of a strange bourgeoise passion.
looking at the rows of little houses out the window at night, with their gardens and all, is my English middle-class dream. I just want to be out there with my wellies mucking about with Postman Pat. Or the Jolly Postman. Or at least a vet.
Anyway, we missed the bus and were a bit late to the reception, but it was ok. I even succeeded in mingling adequately, and mercifully it was over soon. Then we trooped off to the Hall, which was very Hogwarts, and had supper. It was all yummy and I actually think my table etiquette was exactly right, even to how you’re supposed to tear of little bits of your roll and butter them individually. I sat next to Kelly. Across from us was a young economics professor who talked literally the entire time, nonstop, about economics to the poor girl next to him.
The professor next to Kelly was a wonderful caricature of a british academic, in his black robe, and he kept saying awesome things to her, such as what was her favorite period? (historical, I presume), and coerced her into eating her veg by saying they were full of antioxidants and good for the bowels. He was SO cool. I wish I’d been sitting next to him.
Kelly’s tutor was the coolest professor at the whole Uni, however. He has a round red face, crazy white flyaway hair that stands straight up, a watch on a chain, a yellow bow tie, and the most extravagant manner. AND he is an astronomer. I cannot express his awesomeness. I totally wish he were my tutor. But Debbie pointed out one of mine, and we ended up catching each other’s eye and having an odd sort of wave down the table.
He came up after. His name is Dr. John Ballam, and he seems really nice. It turns out I share him with Abbey.
The Warden gave a speech, and he was also really cute and stereotypical. I loved them all, the dusty old professors.
So there we were, at Oxford, sitting at this long table, under the paintings of Wren and everybody, with the candles and the professors in their gowns. It was insane. Half the time Kelly and me just giggled and tried to figure out how to open the water bottle, which was some kind of engineering marvel.
MAD.
Apres, everyone went to the college bar for drinks, but we Kelly and I didn’t want drinks, we wanted INTERNETS. So they showed us where the computer room was, and so we had EMAIL and FACEBOOK and it was wonderful.
But then, of course, we had to take the bus home in the night.
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